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Oct. 28th, 2010


let it go

I haven't seen the movie yet, and I'm not a big fan of the book but these lines from Eat, Pray, Love struck me --

“If you clear out all that space in your mind that you’re using right now to obsess about this guy, you’ll have a vacuum there, an open spot -- a doorway. And guess what the universe will do with that doorway? It will rush in -- God will rush in -- and fill you with more love than you ever dreamed. So stop using David to block that door. Let it go.”

And this particular line resonates -- "So stop using David to block that door. Let it go."

Maybe that's exactly it. Maybe I should just let myself be empty.

Who knows, the universe might have something (or someone) beautiful in store for me.

For now, I can only wait and look forward.
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Aug. 30th, 2010


so i ask myself ...

what will become of me after this?
what happens then?
where do i go?
what will i do?
what now?
who's next?

Aug. 16th, 2010


bakit ka biglang nagbago?

gusto ko lang malaman kasi nahihiwagaan ako.

the one

who got away is now married, I'm not sure if happily but looks like it, and with a child of his own.

if only I had cared enough to know and understand what was going on

if only I had been more sensitive of his intentions

if only I had been more wise

it would've been him. there would've been us.

but I had been stupid for choosing to hang out with --

the one who's not worth it

the one who sucked me dry

the one who kept me high

the one who couldn't say yes

the one who gave false hopes

the one who only stood as a friend with satisfactory benefits

the one who insisted on pushing his way into my life

only to exit later, gracefully

why? so I won't feel and notice the forthcoming excruciating pain?

I had misjudged my wit

and paid no mind to lurking complications

cause I like diving into rivers that rush in.

Aug. 12th, 2010


i miss...

rush projects

rush hours

rush meetings

i miss the rush experienced after doing something intense

i miss the rush that takes over you before engaging into something extreme

i miss the rush i feel when i'm sitting beside you.

Jul. 13th, 2010


gastronomic adventures

because i'm a foodie and a frustrated food stylist...

Tapsi Ni Vivian - G. Fernandez, Marikina
half-eaten tapsilog @ Tapsi Ni Vivian

MyThai Kitchen - Eastwood, Libis

grilled boneless chicken

(L)fish fillet (R)bagoong rice

shrimp noodles

The Flying Pig - T. Morato, Quezon City

spaghetti bolognese

half slab pork ribs with bacon basmati rice

The Red Crab - T. Morato, Quezon City

king crab in szechuan sauce

good to the last shell

polished off crustacea

Mr. Ube - Binondo, Manila

tom yam soup

Jul. 11th, 2010


do you have to haunt me even in my sleep?

sleeping is the only time my mind gets to rest.
it's the only time i can escape from memories of you.
it's the only time i am FREE from you.
but, why then, did you have to see me there?

Jun. 1st, 2010


ako, sila'y nandito na, ikaw na lang ang kulang.

I got wasted last Saturday, but it was a good kind of "wasted". The night was filled with good vibes, good friends, fantastic music rendered by amazing bands and lots of booze.

my best guy friend, GB

Jim and Anna

Anyway, I was so blown away by Up Dharma Down's live performance. They've been around for so long, heard they've been everywhere but that night was my first time to see them play. Ang galeng! I remember when I was getting ready to leave the house, I was kind of wishing for them to play Sana. And they did. I was like, "Aah, perfect. Just perfect."

ze band

I think Armi's new look suits her.

For the longest time, I've been wondering which song this line -- "isuot na ang yong sapatos na may gulong" -- comes from and by which band. I used to have a musician friend and one time we were riding his car and this song played on his radio. He was singing along and I thought the tune was catchy. When he asked me if I knew the song, obviously I didn't know, he was kind of surprised that I didn't.

But I knew last Saturday. It was Skatetown by Chillitees!

Heh. I don't know where this story is going. Where was I? Oh, so when I heard Chillitees play that song, memories of that car ride one or two years ago flashed. *sigh*

This is Chillitees. They're a great band. I looked them up the next day and found out they started playing back in 2006. Wow. Where the hell was I? How come I didn't hear of them then? Or was I not into the music scene yet that time?

Uela's (vocalist) voice complemented the band's music. They sound really good. And I love her glistening fedora hat. Sometimes, I feel I want to be a stylist to musicians. It'd be an interesting work.

And Johnoy was there! This guy is my new favorite acoustic guitarist.

I had such a wonderful time last Saturday.

But once in a while, during that night, I would start to feel it again. And everything around me is silent. Ugh. I wonder when this'll stop. 

May. 25th, 2010


things will be better soon

I'm happy with what my horoscope says today:

Scorpio Horoscopes

(Oct 23 - Nov 21)

Monday, May 24th, 2010 -- It might feel as if an emotional storm is subsiding, but the squalls will continue to come and go. Fortunately, you're able to weave a tapestry in your imagination from the fragments of fantasies to create a new vision for the next phase of your life. Don't worry if your dreams are not realistic; you don't need to come up with a plan yet. For now, this is just an exercise to prepare you for what's ahead. Listen to more about today with Rick Levine's Daily Planet Pulse Podcast.

This is exactly where I am and what I feel right now.

I still pray for strength and guidance though, that I may get over this and find my inner peace soon. I also hope to be able to, one day, be friends again with the person who's given me pain as much as joy joy as much as pain.

That is... if fate allows.

Mar. 18th, 2010


tea does the trick

There's nothing more comforting than a hot cup of tea after a long day, a heavy meal, a rainy night; during a long absorbing conversation or that time when you just want quiet alone time.

My fave is earl grey, black. It's got that strong distinct taste and the scent, as you pour the hot water and drench the tea bag in it, is wonderful. I'm not a milk person so I prefer my teas or coffees black. But today, I discovered earl grey with lemon is good.

Another discovery (from last year) was this:

Genmaicha - it's green tea leaves with roasted brown rice. The white ones resemble a popcorn. I think during the process of roasting the brown rice, they pop and form like popcorn. Neat isn't it? My mom got me this last year and it's a fave too. They say green teas help you lose weight. Hmm...

Here's a closer look:

And I use this cute teapot for my genmaicha:

Apart from teas, I am also a coffee lover. But there's another day to be talking about that.

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